Miranda Dear,
The aim of this is to give you a moment's pause. You can do with these words what you like, but know that they only come out of concern (If you do not agree, you are in good company. My words have caused quite an uproar and much debate amongst my critics. In fact, one of my novels was banned because it was deemed subversive and too disturbing for the public). I realize you have been secluded on an island for most of your life and have not been exposed to anything but what your father permits, but is immediately running into the arms of another man a means to break free of that seclusion? As you were imprisoned on the island, so you readily jump into imprisonment again in the form of marriage? Maybe "imprisonment" is too harsh. I am not saying to never marry, nor to completely avoid men, but I am suggesting trying to develop your own sense of self without a man to define you. You are still young and know less about the world than most. I can tell you from experience, marriage and raising a family can be difficult. It can also be lonely. Who knew one could feel so isolated while surrounded by family and friends?
In some respects I envy you, envy your freedom from social norms and proper etiquette. I envy your ignorance of the pressure that comes with being a wife and, possibly, a mother. To blissfully fall in love at first sight is a beautiful concept, unfortunately it is not realistic. You have expressed a desire in your own posting to learn more about the world outside of your island. I believe it would serve you well to turn that desire inward to learn more about yourself as well.
Be assured, I offer these words as kindly advice and nothing more. Good luck, Miranda, whatever path you choose.
3 comments:
See that's the old stuff. Every female needs a man. Listen Kate you want every man to carry a flag and a spear and sing some marching songs? You want Miranda to spend her life looking into things and try to find the right and wrong parts? You know what's going to happen to her someday.... she'll find herself all alone.... forever locked away and the takers will have the key. Having a man will help her... that's all the experience she needs. There's nothing but taking in the world, and he/she who takes the most is the smartest and it doesn't make a difference how. Fallin in love at first sight does exist thats just how me and Ruth are.
Well Kate, I do suppose you are right in considering Miranda naive however I don't feel that that alone is grounds against her fast-growing love. Miranda has spent her life in on this island, I too come from a small impoverished island and dreamed of a world beyond its borders. After leaving home I spent years in exile writing and living all over Europe, but I couldn't have accomplished this without my lovely Nora. Perhaps raising a family and leaving the stability of home is necessary for Miranda so that she too can find her voice.
Kate, you are so cynical about love at first sight. I fell quite in love with my Jenkin when I first spied his legs, and even though he beat me and drove me crazy, I loved him best of all my five husbands. Marriage is only imprisonment if you let it be so. If you take charge, you will be a happy wife. Let your husband know you are the boss of him, in the bedroom and in the rest of your lives together, including obtaining control of the property. Make your husband your slave, and you will never have anything to complain about. He says he loves you now, at first sight, but once you get him home and take the reins, he'll be groveling at your feet for your love in return. Take my advice, for I am quite experienced in matters of love, sex, and marriage!
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